rachg82: (XF fangirl)
Rizzoli & Isles )

I don't have much else to talk about today, so let's skip right to that meme now.

The X-Files and Community )
rachg82: (Adama/Roslin Oath kiss)
I don't think I've mentioned this here yet, but [livejournal.com profile] dosidella recently linked me to this site, which allows you to play old-school games like Dr. Mario & Donkey Kong online legally for free (no downloading required). I figured more than a few of you would be interested. So!

In other news:

-Rizzoli & Isles continues to be the gayest thing to ever happen to me. I'm saying. Gayer than my on-again, off-again WTFship with Amy. Gayer than RuPaul's Drag Race on Logo. Gayer than Ms. Jay teaching you how to smize. Gayer than all six seasons of The L Word, including that time Dana took a hit of acid and danced around on stage with Tegan & Sara. Okay, maybe not THAT gay, but pretty effing gay nonetheless )

-I don't have anything to say about Psych, Community, or Parks & Rec this week except to give all-around gold stars.

-Revenge is the crackiest shit that ever cracked.

-I'm still watching Castle, and I enjoyed it this week, though it made me wrack my brain trying to remember the name of the XF fic I read way back when which started out basically the same way. Oh, interwebz.

-Bones )

-I was thinking it'd be fun to do a poll here asking people to choose which three eps they'd use to introduce a newb to the fandom(s) of their choice, but then it was like -- um, I don't know what shows you'd pick or how much room you'd need for your answers. And then of course I could pick the shows, which is what I'm about to do, but creating a real, actual poll for that kind of dealio sounds like a lot of work. And see my mood icon? Right.

So, instead, here's a list of shows (I'm limiting myself to ten). You can share your answers in the comments (and feel free to add new fandoms of your own):

-X Files
-Battlestar Galactica
-Gilmore Girls
-My So-Called Life
-Parks & Rec

I'll share my choices in my next entry, obviously.

In RL news:

-I made home-made GF mac & cheese tonight, and it was pretty dang good. If you'd handed it to me without telling me it was GF, I wouldn't have been able to tell the difference.

-Similarly, the GF rigatoni I had with B earlier this week tasted great as well. This is a big hoo-ray thing for me, because up until now I hadn't been able to find any good rice-based noodles, and it was very tragic.

-Aside from the cooking, I've been super lacking in motivation this week. One of those ~I don't want to do anything, say anything, move my body, or think~ situations. Where it's all you can do to get your dishes done, drag yourself to the store, etc. Like, writing this entry is an accomplishment. I missed my appointment with my psych today (though I'm still seeing my counselor tomorrow), spent a lot of time in bed for no reason, took forever to do anything or go anywhere, and yeah. I just feel stressed, I guess. And it's adding to the depression, so that sucks. I think I'm nervous about talking to my sister as well, especially after I reread the email she sent me (from when our uncle died) while I was working on my Year in Review post this week. It's like -- how much could she have changed in five or six months? And what caused her to change? How do I know she doesn't still feel that way underneath it all? How do I know it's not LIKELY she'll say that kind of stuff to me again soon? I'm going to talk to my counselor about it tomorrow, but in the meantime it's weighing on me.

And I think that's it. For my Vid of the Day, here's a lighthearted one by TaraGel:

rachg82: (serenity booth)
Things that happened today:

1. My sister and I spoke )

2. I spent four hours on a round-trip bus ride to nowhere, a.k.a. Hillsboro. A+, self, for catching the wrong bus AND failing to write down the actual ADDRESS or NAME of the place you were going.

Seriously, if I'd been on time, I would've just looked for a church near that cross-street & figured it out (it was an ACA meeting)--I had directions, just not the damned address/name of the building--but getting on the wrong bus in the first place put me back by like twenty minutes, and I am not at all familiar with that part of town or super comfortable with wandering through it in the dark, clueless. So by that point it was already a lost cause, and I was like, "Fuck it. Let's turn around." SO RIDICULOUS. Ugh.

I'm committed to making it to a Saturday meeting if possible, though (it'll take place downtown, where I'm used to going). I really want to make ACA a priority again, even if I can only swing one meeting a week or one every other week. Just as long as it's at least semi-frequent & consistent. My goal for the next meeting is to share at least once & to stop & say hello to people after, rather than just walking out immediately when it ends.

3. I got out of work at 1:30, but still got paid for the full eight hours (tomorrow & Friday won't be paid, but hey, small favors). Oh, and: my manager gave the okay for me to change my schedule on Thursdays to 7 am - 3:30 pm, allowing me to continue seeing my counselor on a weekly basis. He said it may have to change if it becomes an issue (i.e. an inconvenience to others), but I think it'll probably be fine. At least for now. BIG RELIEF. Like, I was just shy of a panic attack while waiting for his response.

4. This should be included in "things that happened yesterday", but hush: I made gluten-free, egg-free chocolate chip cookies. And my beater broke half-way through, so I had to mix it all by hand, which was a ~big production~, what with the pouting & wrist-flapping & soreness & all (in other words: first world problems). So good, though.

5. I got an early Xmas present from Jen, including season 2 of Community, season 6 of Bones, and a tiny stuffed Yoshi. YOSHI IS OBVIOUSLY THE MOST IMPORTANT PART. Hee. But seriously, yay-ness. I have the bestest best friend ever.

For my Vid of the Day, have some random outtakes:

rachg82: (Bones therapy)
I'm sleepy & have already been on my computer for too long (blame Text Twist & the neverending about-to-end fic of doom), so this entry will be quick:

-Psych )

-Community )

-Parks & Rec )

-I feel like I have more things to say, but again with the sleepyness. I had an appointment with my counselor today, which I'll probably talk more about later. For now, I'll leave y'all with a Vid of the Day. This one's by Jarisafia:

rachg82: (XF fangirl)
I think it's time for another TV post:

-Parenthood )

-Community )

-Parks & Rec )

In other news, I spontaneously began rewatching season 3 of Bones today. I think this is where I admit I'm not really that jazzed for the upcoming season. I KNOW, I'M SORRY. It's weird. It's not that I don't love the characters anymore--I do--or that I don't have ideas of things I'd love to see--I definitely do--but season 6 left me a bit deflated as far as my confidence in them delivering. I'm going to stop reading anything that comes out of stupid HH & SN's mouths, though, and that will probably help. As I said to [livejournal.com profile] tempertemper the other day, they could douche chill the second coming. Every interview they do, ever, is just like, "UGH, SHUT YOUR FACE."

That being said, I'm still hopeful, still fangirling it up--I mean, I wouldn't be working on this fic still if I weren't; it's really important to me (P.S. I'm up to 4,400 words now. Slow & steady progress!)--and still passionate about the show, but I felt like I had to admit those feelings somewhere.

ANYHOO. How about a Vid of the Day? This one's by oneminutegalactica (looove) & cracks me up every time.

rachg82: (abed is my homeboy)
This whole waking up with a killer migraine that lasts for hours deal? And having it happen multiple days in a row? Not a fan. Like, I'm just gonna go out on a limb & put that out there. Call me crazy. *rolls eyes* As if the normal daily headaches aren't enough of a pain already. LIFE. WHY.

Anyway. At least there's new TV:

-Community )

-Parks & Rec )

Aaand I think that's it for tonight. I don't have anything else super exciting to add. In honor of Community's return, though, here's a VotD by sisabet:

rachg82: (rizzoli matching puke outfits)
1. Just made a rice protein smoothie with those blueberries I bought at the Farmers Market, plus added rasberries, bananas, honey, & a combo of rice & almond milk. It was pretty much the biggity biggity bomb. Just so y'all know.

2. It's about time for an icon meme, methinks. Taken from [livejournal.com profile] torigates:

my answers )

3. Since tomorrow is Labor Day, I won't be working. As for today, I worked 6 am - 1 pm instead of the normal 6:35 am - 5:05 pm Sunday shift I would've had. It's amazing how short a seven-hour day feels when you're getting used to ten. Unfortunately, I won't get holiday pay since I don't qualify yet, but I'll be working a full day on Tuesday & a half-day on Wednesday to make up for it. I'll even get something like two hours of overtime pay, technically. I'll probably exhaust myself in the process, but whatevs. I really need money. Currently, I have something like thirty-odd dollars to last me the next two weeks. GOOD TIMES.

4. Speaking of work, behold my favorite customer quote of the day (re: the increasing absence of pay phones on the streets due to everyone getting cell phones): "I mean, where's Superman gonna change his clothes?"

Also, gotta love the 90 year old woman I helped get signed up today, who, when asked if she had an email address, was like, "What's that?" Cue me answering, "Email? You know, on the internet?" And her shouting (they always shout, haha), "Internet?! What?" And me again, like: "Um, internet…like on a computer?" And then her final response of, "OH, I DON'T HAVE ONE OF THOSE. I'M LUCKY IF I CAN FIGURE OUT MY TV, HONEY." Hee!

FYI: I heard yesterday that the oldest customer we have is 106. Apparently he's pretty with it, too. *106* (it bears repeating). I can't even. He would've been three when the Model T came out. And he has a cell phone before I do. Haha.

5. A lot of my flist has been doing this, most recently [livejournal.com profile] keenai, so I'll jump on the bandwagon. Here's my Fall/Winter TV Schedule )

That's all for tonight. For my Vid of the Day, let's celebrate the upcoming return of Community this month (not to mention season 2 coming out on DVD) with some awesome Abed quotes, edited together by tvgirl17:

ETA: I can't resist:

rachg82: (abed is my homeboy)
1. The job is a go, people. I'mma make it rain! (In Portland! Which neverrr happens otherwise. Y'know. Heh.) cut for more boring job stuff )

ETA: Ooh! And I almost forgot, the job includes free cell phone service (not sure if they literally give you a phone, too, or if you pay for that. We'll see). Kind of hilarious because, really? A free cell phone was probably the only possible way to make me willingly own one.[/curmudgeon]

2. Speaking of money, buying a blender is probably one of the best things I've ever done. SO MUCH FUN. Even when I was a kid, we didn't have one; my best friend & I would hand-stir milkshakes, haha. We thought we were brilliant at it though, like we were gonna go out & have a milkshake stand & get filthy rich or something.

3. I put season 3 of Friday Night Lights on request at the library yesterday, so I should be getting that soon (it needs to be moved from another location). Fingers crossed it arrives today. I need some Eric & Tami Taylor in my life.

4. Current has been airing some of the docs from that "50 Documentaries to See Before You Die" series I mentioned the other day, and yesterday they played "One Day in September" (about the 1972 Munich games/attack), which I'd never seen before. I have to say I agree with its placement on the list. Tense, disturbing, & frankly heartbreaking (the Philip Glass music doesn't help, heh. My tear ducts have like a pavlovian response to him). The whole thing is up on YouTube, too (Part One), in case anyone wants to watch. Here's the trailer as well.<--I know, I'm so helpful.

5. My sleep schedule is getting closer to normal--I'm going to bed in the evening, not the morning--but I keep waking up way too early. Like, 2 or 3 in the morning, completely opposite to my normal problem of konking out for 10-16 hours at a time. Cut it out, body!

And that's it. For my Vid of the Day, here's some random funnyness:

rachg82: (Adama/Roslin reading is sexy)
1. Here are my answers for that ship meme )

2. I was on hold with the unemployment agency for three--count them, THREE--hours today. Let me break it down for y'all:

First hour: Waiting, waiting, waiting -- whoops, my cordless phone died. SON OF A.

Second hour: Calling back on old school coiled-cord-having phone (bonus: it magically turns modern hold music into funky victrola jamz (not really)), waiting, waiting, almost falling asleep while waiting, waiting -- whoops, wrong department, ma'am! Let me transfer you…(nooo)

Third hour: Wait, wait, aaaand wait some more -- FINALLY GET SOMEONE ON THE LINE WHO CAN HELP.

I swear to the gods. BUT. Good news is they filed a new claim & did the benefit year fix-y thing, so I'll still get the same amount per week as before. For now, at least. I was so anxious during that call, though, can I just say. I've taken to repeating The Serenity Prayer to myself over the last few days, whenever my anxiety/stress levels start hitting the roof, and I definitely had to remind myself of it a couple times then.

3. I finally walked over to that call center up the street yesterday. The person I needed to talk to wasn't available, but I spoke with another guy who gave me the info I needed to apply online (which I did, once I arrived home). I was wicked nervous while talking to him/handing over my resume (my hand was like a pissed-off faultline), but I'm not really surprised by that. It's gonna be hard for me to suddenly be around a lot of people again (in new situations), but as long as the job itself is something I can do (physically & mentally/psychologically -- i.e. it's not something completely out of my comfort zone that's constantly inducing panic), then I know the rest will ease up some in time. The beginning is always the hardest part for me. I remember when I started at Xerox (and again, anytime I underwent a big change there), I was such an anxious wreck that I'd end up throwing up/getting sick in the restroom more days than not. SO miserable. But I got through it.

The online application process involved a few tests, too, e.g. one for math, one for your personality, etc. I haaaate when employers do the personality ones. Everything feels like a trick question, all, "Sooo, do you like people?" Like, what? Which people? WHAT DO YOU MEAN? Sometimes…I guess? Is that okay? I HATE YOU. You're "people". NOW WHAT.

(…I seem to be into capslock today. Don't mind me. This is what happens after three hours on hold & thinking shiny happy shippy thoughts for that meme. Now I'm simultaneously drained & hyper.)

Anyway, I didn't hear back from them yet, and I don't know if that's not a big deal or bad news, or what. We'll see.

4. Since I knew I wasn't going to be on the streets in the near future, I let myself buy some art supplies earlier. Two pads of paper (one for charcoal/pastels & one for wet media), a small set of paintbrushes, and watercolor paints. I'm used to using oils, but that means disposing of paint thinner & all that hassle, so I decided to branch out this time. We'll see how it goes.

5. I was supposed to get together with my friend last night, but for boring reasons I won't bore you guys with, it got pushed back to next week. I told her there'd be a cancellation fee if she does it again. Heh. MY TIME IS MONEY.

Aaand that's it for today. For my VotD, I'll cap off the vidspamming above with a bit more shippy-action (by Very987). This one combines a great episode with great music. Kinda can't go wrong, there.

ETA: Why is Mother Russia LJ making me have to repeatedly refresh the page to get embedded videos to appear? I do not approve!
rachg82: (bsg i salute you)
1. I finally talked to my aunt today. )

2. June-uary is officially over. It's supposed to get up into the eighties over the next few days. I'd really like to go buy some new capris or workout pants (my old ones are too big now. I have to fold the waistband down to keep them up) so I'll be more comfortable going for more frequent jaunty woodland walks again, but it'll have to wait after the chunk of dough I just spent on those prescription sunglasses. I mean, I COULD afford it--pants aren't that expensive--but I'd rather stagger out the spendyness. I have other things I can wear in the meantime. Still, it's on my mind. One way or another, I'd like to take advantage of the weather with some tree-huggin', especially now that I'll have sunglasses to protect mi ojos from ~el sol diablo~. Heh.

3. I watched the prosecution's rebuttal case today in the Casey Anthony trial, & can I just say--that is some slam-dunk shit right there. Homegirl is guiltyyy. I do feel bad for her though. She's clearly disturbed (regardless of guilt or innocence), going by her history of lying if nothing else. I don't mean that she's criminally insane--she's been found competent--but no one creates the kind of lies she did, taking them to the extremes that she did, without there being at least a few squirrels jugglin' knives in their head. Know what I'm saying? She's off. If she indeed was abused as a child, that would help explain things, but unfortunately imo that doesn't negate the evidence of her killing her daughter. It's a sad case no matter how you look at it. Utterly fascinating to watch from an objective standpoint though, especially for all the back & forth intensity between the lawyers (Ashton does not fuck around, seriously) & the forensic testimony. The Bones fangirl in me gets excited whenever a forensic anthropologist is called. Heh. I know, I have issues.

4. Let's talk about TV, y/y? As promised, I still plan to talk more in-depth about my BSG rewatch again soon, but for now here's a few other misc. tidbits:

-I know that Community is far too meta to warrant serious shipping, but I can't help it: in my mind, after the series is over? It'll be Britta/Jeff, Annie/Troy, and Abed/Robin (the Secret Service agent, hee. I ♥ them!). Troy & Abed will still be epic BFFs of course. Abed will totally be the cool uncle who teaches their kids about Batman & Kickpuncher. You know I'm right.

-What is up with Nigel & Mary on So You Think You Can Dance? Is it just me or is he being awkwardly flirty with her lately? I'm not just talking about the kiss.

-Kristin Chenoweth is my new fave guest judge, along with Debbie Reynolds. You know how I said recently that I like to imagine Cat & Mary as besties behind the scenes? From this point on I'm gonna create my own fantasy world where Kristin Chenoweth, Debbie Reynolds, & Debbie Allen all get together every Wednesday night & watch the show together while braiding each other's hair & sucking on Ring Pops.

5. Seeing as how effing fab SYTYCD was the other night, I'm gonna share my favorite five dances with you all now from the last two weeks as a VotD. click here for flaily hands )
rachg82: (here for laura)
-I'm feeling especially sleepy & lazy right now. What I'd really like to do is plan an evening in front of the TV with pop & snacks, but nooo.

-There's an ACA meeting this afternoon, but there's also one on Monday evenings. I'd have to get ready in a hurry (and pay for a cab) to go to the one today without being late, so I'm kinda tempted to do the Monday one instead. Especially because public transit is more convenient on weekdays.

-I do however want to go somewhere today. I just don't want to rush. I'm thinking I'll make myself a sandwich for lunch, take a shower, and then bus it down to Portland. I can make a pitstop at Forest Park to finish [livejournal.com profile] gina227's photo meme question from way back & then take care of [livejournal.com profile] keenai's by hitting up Voodoo Doughnut. The one downtown is still closed for renovation, but dear God have I been craving their donuts something fierce lately, so I don't even care--I'll go to the NE one. And I can excuse the gluttony by having taken a walk. TADA.

-[livejournal.com profile] teachlikeroslin and [livejournal.com profile] scifi_mel have created their own Hot 25 lists as well, in case some of you missed them & would like to see. You can find them here & here.

-Big-ups to New York, y'all. I'm sure you've all heard the news by now, so I'll just say this: I really needed a big smile this week & they delivered.

-Many of you on my flist are bemoaning the late Fall premiere of Bones this year & wondering how you'll fill your time. Fortunately, you have me, the TV-obsessed oompa loompa who never tires of pimping new shows. May I suggest any of the following? )

-I worked on my fic a bit more last night. It still feels a lot like chipping away at a huge block of granite, but sometimes that's just how it goes. At least there's progress being made, albeit incredibly slowly. I guess on the bright side the longer summer hiatus means less of a hurry for things like this.

-I put a temporary halt to my BSG rewatch after my uncle's death (being at the end of s4, I think most of you will understand why), but I think I'm ready to jump back into it now, once my TV's working again that is. I only have a few eps left. Pretty sure the finale's gonna kill me, but I don't mean that in a bad way. It'll just be emotional because of the subject matter.

Anyway, I'm gonna get going now, before I can convince myself that napping would be a better way to spend the rest of the day.

For my VotD, here's an appropriately themed song:

rachg82: (Baltar/Six sky)
It's been a couple days since I updated, so I feel like I should, but I'm having one of those issues where I can't think of what to write & everything I CAN think of sounds boring. So I end up just sitting & staring at the computer screen all "BLAH" like a human question mark. "Entry! Why won't you write yourself? Be a team player!" I hate that.

Anyway, I'll just ramble for a minute & we can all pretend it's interesting.

-I had a really bad migraine the night before last, and as a result I've slept more than I've been awake the last two days. I still don't feel quite "over it" yet--my limbs feel heavy, my stomach is frakked, it's hard to read things, when I went to the store yesterday I had difficulty talking (words came out wrong/stilted), etc. Immediately afterward, I felt simultaneously exhausted & yet extremely relaxed/almost good (migraine euphoria, in other words), but then (and now) I just came back to feeling out of it & vaguely depressed yet not. I'm used to all of it, but it's strange, especially because I don't always experience the postdrome phase so severely. It really depends on how bad the migraine itself is, usually (in this case, it was pretty bad). It's good to know there's a reason for all of it though. I find it comforting when I can understand what's going on with my body. It's kind of interesting, almost. The brain is an odd thing.

-During the few hours I was awake yesterday, I watched a couple episodes of some ghost show on cable (I always end up watching the most random crap when sick, I swear). It was your usual fare of sillyness--every ghost in the world apparently wears white dresses circa the Victorian era--but I heard a quote from one of the women that I liked: "God's delay doesn't necessarily mean God's denial." She said her dead father appeared to her & said that, which--whatever, who knows--but I don't think it matters whether it's true or even whether you believe in God. It's still a nice concept.

-Speaking of things I've heard lately that I liked, here's a few more:

"You make your choices and you live with them, and in the end you are those choices."-BSG

"Sometimes we have to leave people behind so that we can go on--so that we can continue to fight."-BSG

"Success is not a goal. It's a byproduct."-Friday Night Lights

"A friend once said, and I found to be true, that everyday people--they lie to God too--so what makes you think that they won't lie to you?"-Lauryn Hill

The last one is a line from a song, and I've of course heard it before, but it had been a while. I've been talking with [livejournal.com profile] jasminelily about some of the things my mom said to me in those emails, and the likelihood that she was lying about what my nephew said, so that lyric resonated with me.

-Parks & Rec this week was freaking hilarious. "I'm gonna make out with him. On his face." HA. Also: everyone drunk. BEST EVER.

-Community doesn't know how to be anything but awesome, I don't think. ABED WAS HAN SOLO, Y'ALL. HE MADE OUT WITH ANNIE & THEN WAS JUST LIKE, "COOL", AND WALKED OFF. Hahaha.

-I continue to enjoy Friday Night Lights. If I had Netflix, I'd stream it from the beginning, but I prefer living in the 20th century so I don't. Okay, so that's a joke, but it's not far off from the truth. Heh. I do want to rent the first season though. I suspect I will over the summer. There's a few other shows I plan to check out, too, most likely. Probably Farscape, Castle, and maybe Dr. Who. Maybe. I've seen a couple episodes & really didn't get sucked in, but I know a lot of people who are into it, so I'm open.

-Lastly, I'm still slowly but surely working on my fic, though this one has been giving me a hard time. I talked about it with [livejournal.com profile] keenai the other day though, which I'll include here, 'cause that's how I roll )

For my Vid of the Day, I'm gonna get my convert-powerz on. It's come to my attention that some of you are still not watching Community. This simply won't do. Hence, I shall provide clips to help make it right. You're welcome.

rachg82: (XF fangirl)
This is me right now, waiting for tonight's Bones to finally arrive:


There are entirely too many damn hours sitting between me & this episode, people. I NEED IT IN MY LIFE.

What to do, I ask, other than distract myself some more? Fortunately, you all get to reap the benefits of my boredom. Me + too much time on my hands = YouTube. Lots of it. (who needs cleaning, laundry, or applying to jobs? Pshhh)

5 vids o' timewastey goodness )
rachg82: (annie dancing bones)
1. More photo meme funtimes, ahoy! Here's [livejournal.com profile] torigates' request: "I'd like to see your kitchen and inside your fridge", and here's the oh-so-fascinating result )

2. My dreams continue to be wack-ass weird. I mean, on one hand I'm still getting the predictable family dreams, so that part's sort of status: normal, but on top of that they've just been so damned ODD lately. I found myself in some cheesy horror movie last night, and the baddie was a green-skinned (like the Wicked Witch) chick who would pop up out of nowhere and, like, stab you with her nails and shit if you didn't do whatever she wanted. Plus she had some magical power to make men obsessed with her. That by itself wouldn't be so weird (for a dream), but then guess how I convinced her to chill out & leave this one kid in my mom's family room alone? Why, I brought in Freddy Krueger of course. And she was all, "I'm not like that, am I?" And I was like, "Well, you're kind of a jerk. I mean, no offense." Hee hee. Then she felt all bad & let the kid go.[/clearly I'm a hero in my head]

Oh, and I totally hardcore made out with her afterward. HAHA. I think she had normal skin by then though.

What the fuuuuuck.

3. I've been working on my fic more, and I'm having a much easier time with it now. It's good to have something positive to focus on.

4. You know how you have to choose a mood for each entry? I keep running into the issue lately where I don't know what mood I am. There's honestly so many different things I feel about various parts of my life right now, and sometimes it leaves me feeling sort of…~nothing~ all over. Like, a big question mark. I just don't know. I do know I feel a bit lost regarding what to hope for & do with everything right now. There's still a lot of hopelessness & disillusionment in me, which I just sort of try to ignore. There's pain & anxiety over family stuff. There's a sense of failure, and the rut I feel stuck in when it comes to jobs & schooling & RL friendships & weight loss & self-improvement and…yeah, pretty much everything. But there's also, hey, at least my living room & kitchen are clean. Like, that's good. And fic writing also makes me feel good when it's going well, and I have a new candle lit in here that smells nice, and the weather's finally becoming spring-like, so those things are all positive. I've gained weight, which bothers me enormously, but I'm still rational enough to know five pounds is not the end of the damned world, and it could quickly be lost by walking. I don't know, whatever. Some of you know my depression has been pretty stealthy lately, getting much worse at nighttime/when I'm not distracted, but I'm still here, aren't I? And I'm trying to figure out how to find a balance between cheering myself up & not pushing problematic feelings down so that they'll just inevitably come rushing up later, like, "Surprise! Thought we were gone? THINK AGAIN. NOW WE'RE EVEN WORSE." You know? Oy, stupid FEELINGS.

Okay, ramble over. I will add though that I would really like to try & go to an ACA meeting this weekend. I'd also like to take a walk in Forest Park. I don't know if I'll follow through though (largely because my new jeans still aren't hemmed, and my other stuff is crappy looking. It's hard enough getting myself to walk anywhere nearby right now, let alone go downtown where people look nicer. Common sense would tell me "just go freaking get your jeans hemmed then! And do some laundry, stupid!" but it's like RIDIC levels of hard when you're depressed to get off your ass & do anything physical, especially for me if it involves possibly seeing other people). So, I won't say I'm doing it for sure, but I'm at least thinking about it. If I can just get myself to bring those jeans to the cleaners, that'll probably make other things easier & provide more motivation.[/ramble over for real this time. Don't mind me as I write think outloud about stuff no one else in their right mind probably cares about.]

5. My DVR failed to record Parks & Rec + Community AGAIN this week. WTF, mate? I changed the settings though to allow for reruns as well now; maybe it was marking new eps as repeats & then ignoring them or something. *shakes fist*

It did however record Bones, thankfully. )

For my Vid of the Day, here's a fun Community tribute that I found today by bopradar. Makes me want to go rewatch all of season 1 all over again.

rachg82: (troy and abed bffs 4 eva)
Ahem, if I may have all of your attention:

[livejournal.com profile] nomnivore is one of my oldest & dearest online friends--I've known her since before this LJ even existed--and today is her birthday. She deserves a real gift basket, but alas, this virtual version will have to do.

Psst, hey, bb--remember when your name here and at meta was eternaltimtams, & I thought you were a guy named Tim because I'd never actually heard of Tim Tams? Ahh, memories.

In other news:

-This is my 999th post on livejournal. I'm thinking I'll have to do something sentimental & memory lane-ish for the 1,000th. OVER EIGHT AND A HALF YEARS, PEOPLE. If this journal were a human, it'd be learning long division & playing foursquare by now.

-My writer's block is easing up (the subject heading is a sneak peek, check it). I've changed around a few words & I no longer hate the beginning, though I'm still not totally satisfied with it either. But I don't feel like banging my head into a wall while looking at it now, so I feel like that's progress. I'd really like to finish this before the finale. I have no idea what the length will be like as I'm still just working on the first 1,000 pages & have a lot of ideas (some of which may be tossed/saved for a future story), but whatever. I'm just trying to go with it.

Since I'm into wasting time/distracting myself from RL concerns at the moment, I thought I'd share some randomness. cut to save space on your flists )

-[livejournal.com profile] torigates did this as a meme, and I thought it looked fun: ask me to take a picture of something, and I'll post it here. This is your chance to be nosy about my belongings or force my hermit ass to walk somewhere, whatever. Have at it.

-I dreamt last night about the following things: Abed serving me tea (I need to stop watching so much Community), a talking dog, & riding the Night Fury dragon from "How To Train Your Dragon" over an ocean. Oh, and I eventually turned into the giant boss dragon at the end & was all breathing fire at the cartoon Vikings. The best part, meanwhile? I was like (in my head), "Aw, I feel bad lighting this guy on fire! Buuuuut that's kinda my role here. What's a dragon gonna do?"

Finishing this off with a Vid of the Day, I realized tonight that I somehow missed So You Think You Can Dance performing to one of St. Vincent's songs last summer (I could've started my obsession then!), so let's share a clip of that, eh?

Also? While I'm on the subject, I'd love it if someone were to make a fanvid to that song (i.e. the one in the vid below--Paris is Burning) for either Angel (seasons 4/5 & the finale, in particular) or BSG.

Also, also? I'd love to see a Bones fanvid set to Marry Me or Marrow. Doooo itttt.

rachg82: (kara starting over)
1. I have a new musical obsession. I was watching clips on YouTube of Portlandia & Thunderant, and I came across St. Vincent (she performs live in one of the Feminist Bookstore skits--here). Whyyyyy have I not heard of her before? Please tell me I haven't been out of the loop on this one, because if she's not already huge, she should be. three examples of why )

2. I'm very behind on my flist at the moment, just as a heads-up. I've been sleeping a lot the last few days. I have skimmed some entries, but I need to go back & comment on quite a few.

3. I wish prescriptions could be delivered. I ran out of my anti-depressant and didn't feel like going out, so the refill is alllll the way…two seconds from here. Yeah, it's basically in the parking lot behind my apartment complex. THAT'S how lazy I am. Also, I need to do laundry & still haven't gotten my new jeans hemmed so that I can wear them. It's a problem. The pharmacy is closed today anyway though, so I just have to deal. I'll try to drag myself out tomorrow.

4. Rewatch update: I'm done with season 3 of BSG. I've had "All Along the Watchtower" stuck in my head ever since. Three things: A. I ♥ Romo, B. Lee, you break my heart when you sell out Roslin, but your speech is win, & C. "AND YOU MISSED! BUTTERFINGERS."

5. FU, holidays. Bite me.

6. Turns out my DVR did miss both Parks & Rec and Community (I've since watched them, no worries). Nothing to say about the former really, but re: the latter? Way to do a flashback episode consisting solely of things we've never actually seen on the show. Ha. THE HAUNTED HOUSE. Also: way to make fun of retcons in absolutely brill fashion, not to mention your own tropes. And? WAY TO MOCK THE EVERLOVING CRAP OUT OF SHIPPERS & FANVIDS, hahahaha. The slow-mo & Sara Bareilles! BEST EVER.

7. I haven't worked on my fic in a really long time. Insecurity, frustration, and apathy are such mojo-killers. I'd like to get back to it though. Perhaps new music will help.

8. I love LJ, but sometimes I feel like I'm talking into a void on here. I get sad when people don't comment/aren't around, and I feel very uninteresting & lonely. It's just the nature of the medium, I know, but it still gets to me occasionally. I need the outlet, but I hate feeling attached to the outcome. Or people in general.

9. Since I finished my tedious tagging project, I thought I'd share a couple humorous findings )

10. In honor of my rewatch, let's have a Vid of the Day that focuses on season 4.0. This one's by aguid23:

rachg82: (roslin operahouse)
1. I was talking about peanut butter cups with [livejournal.com profile] keenai yesterday, and I told her I'd post the recipe I use for peanut butter cup cookies in my next entry. Behold: deliciousness )

2. Since I enjoy tedious, time-consuming projects, I've been going back through old entries & tagging any that included IM convos. I've made it to March, 2003! Heh. This will take forever. It's fun though. I used to post them on my LJ much more often than I do now. They're funny to reread years later.

While sifting through stuff, I've come across a LOT of surveys & memes, too (my favorite survey response? "What's your orientation?"/"I'm straight. So far." Ha HA. Way to leave yourself an out--pun intended--there, in denial!previous self). I thought it'd be fun to redo one now & see how different (or similar) the responses I get are. Considering four of the eight people who commented to it then are still regular commenters now (more than eight years later--I think that's sort of amazing), it should be interesting.

I _____ Rach.
Rach is _____.
If I were alone in a room with Rach, I would _____.
Rach needs _____.
I want to _____ Rach.
______ is my first memory of Rach.
Every time I see/hear ______, I am reminded of Rach.
I'd give _______ to Rach, if I had the chance.

Fill it out, amigas!

3. I haven't done this in a while, so 3 songs I'm listening to today )

4. Who else saw the Parenthood finale last night? Let's talk about it )

5. For my Vid of the Day, here's some funny snark:

rachg82: (abed humbles me)
I've already polished off the first two discs of season 1. Considering I slept 14 hours last night, & all of my TV watching was done before going to bed? That says a lot. It has been such a pleasure catching up on all the episodes I missed last year. THIS SHOW IS SO GOOD, Y'ALL. Seriously, I'm not exaggerating at all here. It makes me crack up so hard that I have to wipe actual tears from my eyes, & I frequently have to press rewind because I was laughing too loud to hear the next thing they said. It's just hysterical and so, so clever. Especially if you enjoy the use of meta, pop cultural references, & smart, quirky humor like I do.

Also: cut for flailing )

Moving on, I thought I'd share some pics with you guys. I noticed another flistmate post stuff from her scrapbook, and it made me remember the one I created as a teenager. It includes some of my happiest memories, and it's kind of a time capsule unto itself. Those of you who've known me since the meta boards (i.e. since this journal first started in '02) will remember some of these pics, since I posted them on the old yahoo meta photo album, but for the rest of you these will be mostly new.

Also, consider this a reminder, [livejournal.com profile] huh920, that I'm still stalking you. Heh. I want everyone to post pics, damn't.

Scrapbook pics: Let's party like it's 1999 )

Before I go, I also came across a poem [livejournal.com profile] dosidella wrote & sent to me for my 21st birthday (a.k.a. in 2003), which was with my scrapbook but not pasted into it yet. For the sake of posterity, I thought I'd include it here as well. Best BFF ever, yo. excuse me while I get verklempt )

For my Vid of the Day, let's show some love to Troy. This one's by shoopdancer2504.

rachg82: (Brennan walking in the rain)

Ahaha. MY PEOPLE. (Except I would never hate Sarah McLachlan. I saw her in concert five times as a teenager! I'd totally crack up over beating a celebrity pinata though, just in general. Especially if it was a super random one. Like Tony Danza. Hee. "I'll show YOU who's the boss!")

Anyway, so I was able to pick up my W2 today, although it took for-ev-er. Traffic was ridonkeykongulous due to Friday rush hour shenanigans, an accident, & Californian imports who still don't know how to drive in the rain. I very nearly didn't get there by closing time, it was so bad. Of course it didn't help that I tried being spontaneous for once (never a good idea) & hopped on a different bus than originally planned, seeing as it was leaving sooner than the other one, which you'd *think* would be a good idea considering that the driver was all, "Yeah, it'll make no difference." Well, guess what, driver? It did! Your route is as long as Moses' walk through the desert. Effing-A. At least I got some amusement out of it though, because at one point I pissily thought to myself, "THIS IS THE MOST ROUNDABOUT SHIT EVER," (re: the route) and then I realized we were literally driving through a roundabout as I thought it. Heh. That kinda cheered me up. PUN.

Making it even better, picture standing in front of a waterfall the entire time. You know the everpresent hanging mist? Right. Add that to drizzly rain & you've got Portland in the springtime. Frizzy, frizzy hair. Wet pants. Soggy socks. Cold hands. I normally enjoy it--yesterday I was all, "Ohh, moss! Sloppy pavement sounds with every step! Fun, fun"--but today was a bit much. ENOUGH WITH THE PUDDLES ALREADY, STREET.

To make all of it up to myself, including the shittastic week I've had (in case it's not obvious, I'm trying hard to pull myself out of it), I decided to say "frak it" to my normal "Whaaaat? I can't buy myself things! That's crazy talk!"-mentality (particularly present when I'm unemployed), and purchased the following:

Oh, yes. Season 1. I have all weekend to get my taxes done (I plan to do them tomorrow though), so I plan on spending all tonight hunkered down with these eps. Oh, and yes, note the Diet Coke, Kit Kat, & delicious dinner o' champions, a.k.a. a burrito with chips & salsa from Taco Del Mar. I can't remember the last time I ate a candy bar, not counting the chocolates [livejournal.com profile] sumpta sent me, and Friday + DVDs = snacks in my mind, so I told myself it was okay. Plus I hadn't eaten yet today anyway, other than a banana & granola bar, but I'm *trying* to nudge myself toward two meals a day, so yeah. I can excuse one freaking Kit Kat, especially after walking around so much (to the train station, from the stop to the temp agency, from there to Fry's for the DVDs, then to another bus stop, then back home from the train station. It was actually quite a bit).

Adios. Off to become BFFs with Abed. Don't be jealous.

August 2017

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