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Snowpocalypse 2014
So this is what I woke up to this morning:
At this point my campus was already closing, and there was a twenty car pile-up on the freeway (which at first cracked me up…until I found out someone died. Yeahhh, not so funny then). A few hours & one slippery walk to the store later, this is what it looked like:
Okay, not really. That's just a local photo I found on facebook, haha. Along with this gem:
Meanwhile this is the whopping 3-4 inch accumulation outside my window now:
CUE: CHAOS. Honestly, I don't know why Portlandia hasn't done an episode about Portland in the snow yet. We flip our shit over it every single time.
Anyhoo, moving on -- I've got some other RL stuff to talk about.
-We got the results back from Jayden's neurologist, and it didn't show any seizures. I still think they need to check him out more though, because the other day he actually forgot how to tie his own shoes, and it took a while to re-teach him. That's weird, right? I mean he's known how to tie his shoes for years now, and he's 10. He may have just been sliding them on for a while until he got a new pair, but still. How do you forget something like that? And if you do briefly forget, isn't it one of those things where you instantly remember the moment someone starts showing you how to do it again?
I forgot to mention it here before, too, but the psych results he got showed traits of Generalized Anxiety Disorder & Social Anxiety Disorder. Just like his auntie, unfortunately, minus the OCD & depression. Having him talk to a counselor got sidelined due to the concerns over his memory, but my sister asked him like a week ago how often he feels anxious, and he told her "all the time" before amending it to "more often than not." And she confirmed he still wants to talk to someone about it, so hopefully she'll finally make that happen now. It tends to take her forever to do anything, so we'll see.
She also talked to him about his anger at his sister & confirmed at least some of it is because he partly (i.e. he feels this way but knows it's not fair) associates him losing some of his parents' attention & his dad leaving etc with her being born (Lance left only three weeks after she was born, then they got back together again a couple months later, but after that things went consistently downhill until they finally divorced). He says he doesn't actually remember his dad assaulting his mom, though, which is good (it was probably too traumatic for him), but he remembers his dad having to go to jail. I'm sure some of his treatment to her is learned behavior from his dad too, since Lance has always treated her like crap in comparison to Jayden.
They had a couple good sibling moments lately though, which made me happy. One night they had a "sleepover" in Jayden's room with sleeping bags & a movie, and he got all excited over it. And Isabella got terribly sick this week (the doctor actually wanted to hospitalize her, but she seems to be getting better now), and Jayden was super concerned. This is not to say that they never normally have good moments, because they do, but he also gets overly angry & impatient with her all the time, so whenever they're getting along it's kind of newsworthy.
While I'm talking about the kids, I have a couple cute pics of them + one of their kitty, and I figured I'd share:
Theyyyyyy're cute!
-The haunted activities at my sister's house continue. One day recently I was talking with her on the phone when she saw a lamp & picture fly right off a bookshelf (the bookshelf itself didn't move). Then that same day Isabella ran to tell my sister that her bedroom light turned off by itself. And I mean the light switch was even flicked off, so YEAH. This is all in addition to a bunch more shadow figures that my sister has observed walking back & forth between her room & Jay's. I really don't know how she stands living there. It's like a constant horror movie. I keep telling her to call up some ghosthunters to check her house out, ha.
-Amusingly enough, I talked to Nanny a few times recently, and she started yelling at me for believing in ghosts, haha. I was like, "WHY ARE YOU MAD AT ME?" Really I think it's just because she wants me to move in with Corinne, & she knows I'm scared to. It reminded me of my mom though, because by the end of the conversation she was changing her story (my mom used to constantly do that. She never knew what she believed) & was saying she could believe in spirits, just not *ghosts*. Heh. She was like, "DID YOU KNOW THEY CAN'T HURT YOU? DID YOU KNOW THEY'VE NEVER HURT ANYONE?" But then she was like, "UNLESS IT'S A POLTERGEIST." And I was like, "what?!" Hahaha. I brought up how she said once that she saw my grandpa's spirit after he died, and now she claims that she hallucinated it. Oy. But then she was all bringing up the law of the conservation of energy (how energy can't be created or destroyed, only transformed<--*paraphrasing it to the best of my memory*) & using it to explain reincarnation, and I was like, "How can you believe in an afterlife & yet still yell at me for believing in ghosts?!" She's crazy sometimes.
She even brought up this medium my cousin saw & talked about how this lady said my mom had been reincarnated because she "needed to learn humility." That made us both laugh, hee. If there's anything my mom WASN'T, it's humble. I don't like to think of her in another life though. I prefer to think of her up in heaven, playing gin rummy with my grandpa or Russian dancing for Judy Garland or some other such sillyness. I think she doesn't like to say she believes in ghosts out of bitterness too though, because she got kind of heated when she listed off all the other people who've died & never visited her. She said that her dad never believed in anything, and because of that her grandma used to tell them that she'd come back & haunt them after death, but then nothing happened. Even if they had visited her though, she'd just say she hallucinated it, soooo yeah. But then she also implied that only people with mental problems think they've seen a ghost, and I found that pretty insulting. But I didn't respond to it, because I was too busy WTF-ing over the rest of the convo. Overall I was more amused than offended though. And at least she admitted I might have a point when I explained that I think ghosts who are trapped/linger here are different than spirits who have moved on & are maybe just coming back for a visit, and I also told her my theory that I believe ghosts are not only attracted to certain places but certain types of people too (generally the types of people who have some spiritual/psychic abilities. My mom absolutely had them, and I think my sister does a little too. Jury's out on her kids though. I don't think I have any, which explains why stuff doesn't follow me around the way it does my sister. I've only had experiences at friends' houses & around my mom & sister + my sister's kids. I think this type of ability not only attracts them but serves as a power source they can draw upon to make themselves known).
…aaand now that half of you think I'm nuts, let's move on.
Balancing the ghost convo, she complimented me a few times too, which also helped me not be annoyed. She talked about how she thinks I'm good at knowing how to take care of myself, and she also mentioned how I was always smart, but when I was a child I felt the need to SHOW everyone how smart I was (haha, true), and now she thinks I've learned to listen to other people more. I don't know what prompted the compliment, but I appreciated it.
-I've moved tables in my Spanish class, and I'm enjoying it more now that I have more people to practice with. The girl I was sitting by before kind of got on my nerves. Plus my ego got stroked when we were learning about double object pronouns, and I was getting everything right while the rest of the class was floundering, and my teacher was like (in Spanish), "You're very analytical," and I just laughed. Understatement. It always amuses me though when someone correctly observes something about me; it's like I don't expect anyone to ever pay attention to me, so when they do, it's always a surprise.
-I turned 32 in January, and my sister threw a cute little party for me with her kids. I even had a princess hat, hee. And she spent $24 on my favorite cake (poppyseed with cream cheese frosting):
The cake pretty much took the place of one large present, though she did give me a bunch of candy & a couple bowls. Apparently there was also supposed to be cups, but she forgot that bag at the store. D'oh.
-I got my first ever cell phone from Safe Link in the mail, and now I feel less like an Amish person. It's nothing fancy though, as you can see:
…But it gets the job done.
-I visited a dermatologist at OHSU the other week, and they removed a funky looking mole from my back + injected steroids into the two huge keloid scars I have (because they hurt & itch all the time). Unfortunately I found out afterward that my financial assistance doesn't cover it (which means my health plan won't cover it either, once it's in place), but they wrote the bill off because the doctor had told me it *would* be covered. I just can't have it done again, which sucks.
-Speaking of things that suck, the site where my feeding tube goes in has been constantly hurting lately. I really want to get it removed, but I won't even be seeing my surgeon until the end of the month. Woe.
-My pyschiatrist rose my dose of wellbutrin to 300 mgs, but I haven't had the chance to go pick up the new dose yet. I'm just hoping it helps with what's left of my depression. I'm still really drowsy during the day too, but that's kind of normal for me when I'm depressed/anxious, so I'm not sure if I should lower my dose of Seroquel. I swear, I hate playing the medication balance game so much.
I wanted to talk about TV in this entry too, but I'm getting a headache, so I'll have to put it off again. I'll try to post later this weekend if I can. I'm dying to talk about this hot-mess season of AHS in particular, if only to share some of its campy, brilliant gifs.
Por ejemplo:
Hahaha. Best moment of the finale by far, followed closely by "BALENCIAGAAAA!", the fierceness in my icon, and Queenie mind-control dancing. (we'll save the critiques for the actual post itself)
For my Vid of the Day, I have a two-for-one special. I found these two vids earlier this week, and they instantly made me miss the hell out of XF:
At this point my campus was already closing, and there was a twenty car pile-up on the freeway (which at first cracked me up…until I found out someone died. Yeahhh, not so funny then). A few hours & one slippery walk to the store later, this is what it looked like:
Okay, not really. That's just a local photo I found on facebook, haha. Along with this gem:
Meanwhile this is the whopping 3-4 inch accumulation outside my window now:
CUE: CHAOS. Honestly, I don't know why Portlandia hasn't done an episode about Portland in the snow yet. We flip our shit over it every single time.
Anyhoo, moving on -- I've got some other RL stuff to talk about.
-We got the results back from Jayden's neurologist, and it didn't show any seizures. I still think they need to check him out more though, because the other day he actually forgot how to tie his own shoes, and it took a while to re-teach him. That's weird, right? I mean he's known how to tie his shoes for years now, and he's 10. He may have just been sliding them on for a while until he got a new pair, but still. How do you forget something like that? And if you do briefly forget, isn't it one of those things where you instantly remember the moment someone starts showing you how to do it again?
I forgot to mention it here before, too, but the psych results he got showed traits of Generalized Anxiety Disorder & Social Anxiety Disorder. Just like his auntie, unfortunately, minus the OCD & depression. Having him talk to a counselor got sidelined due to the concerns over his memory, but my sister asked him like a week ago how often he feels anxious, and he told her "all the time" before amending it to "more often than not." And she confirmed he still wants to talk to someone about it, so hopefully she'll finally make that happen now. It tends to take her forever to do anything, so we'll see.
She also talked to him about his anger at his sister & confirmed at least some of it is because he partly (i.e. he feels this way but knows it's not fair) associates him losing some of his parents' attention & his dad leaving etc with her being born (Lance left only three weeks after she was born, then they got back together again a couple months later, but after that things went consistently downhill until they finally divorced). He says he doesn't actually remember his dad assaulting his mom, though, which is good (it was probably too traumatic for him), but he remembers his dad having to go to jail. I'm sure some of his treatment to her is learned behavior from his dad too, since Lance has always treated her like crap in comparison to Jayden.
They had a couple good sibling moments lately though, which made me happy. One night they had a "sleepover" in Jayden's room with sleeping bags & a movie, and he got all excited over it. And Isabella got terribly sick this week (the doctor actually wanted to hospitalize her, but she seems to be getting better now), and Jayden was super concerned. This is not to say that they never normally have good moments, because they do, but he also gets overly angry & impatient with her all the time, so whenever they're getting along it's kind of newsworthy.
While I'm talking about the kids, I have a couple cute pics of them + one of their kitty, and I figured I'd share:
Theyyyyyy're cute!
-The haunted activities at my sister's house continue. One day recently I was talking with her on the phone when she saw a lamp & picture fly right off a bookshelf (the bookshelf itself didn't move). Then that same day Isabella ran to tell my sister that her bedroom light turned off by itself. And I mean the light switch was even flicked off, so YEAH. This is all in addition to a bunch more shadow figures that my sister has observed walking back & forth between her room & Jay's. I really don't know how she stands living there. It's like a constant horror movie. I keep telling her to call up some ghosthunters to check her house out, ha.
-Amusingly enough, I talked to Nanny a few times recently, and she started yelling at me for believing in ghosts, haha. I was like, "WHY ARE YOU MAD AT ME?" Really I think it's just because she wants me to move in with Corinne, & she knows I'm scared to. It reminded me of my mom though, because by the end of the conversation she was changing her story (my mom used to constantly do that. She never knew what she believed) & was saying she could believe in spirits, just not *ghosts*. Heh. She was like, "DID YOU KNOW THEY CAN'T HURT YOU? DID YOU KNOW THEY'VE NEVER HURT ANYONE?" But then she was like, "UNLESS IT'S A POLTERGEIST." And I was like, "what?!" Hahaha. I brought up how she said once that she saw my grandpa's spirit after he died, and now she claims that she hallucinated it. Oy. But then she was all bringing up the law of the conservation of energy (how energy can't be created or destroyed, only transformed<--*paraphrasing it to the best of my memory*) & using it to explain reincarnation, and I was like, "How can you believe in an afterlife & yet still yell at me for believing in ghosts?!" She's crazy sometimes.
She even brought up this medium my cousin saw & talked about how this lady said my mom had been reincarnated because she "needed to learn humility." That made us both laugh, hee. If there's anything my mom WASN'T, it's humble. I don't like to think of her in another life though. I prefer to think of her up in heaven, playing gin rummy with my grandpa or Russian dancing for Judy Garland or some other such sillyness. I think she doesn't like to say she believes in ghosts out of bitterness too though, because she got kind of heated when she listed off all the other people who've died & never visited her. She said that her dad never believed in anything, and because of that her grandma used to tell them that she'd come back & haunt them after death, but then nothing happened. Even if they had visited her though, she'd just say she hallucinated it, soooo yeah. But then she also implied that only people with mental problems think they've seen a ghost, and I found that pretty insulting. But I didn't respond to it, because I was too busy WTF-ing over the rest of the convo. Overall I was more amused than offended though. And at least she admitted I might have a point when I explained that I think ghosts who are trapped/linger here are different than spirits who have moved on & are maybe just coming back for a visit, and I also told her my theory that I believe ghosts are not only attracted to certain places but certain types of people too (generally the types of people who have some spiritual/psychic abilities. My mom absolutely had them, and I think my sister does a little too. Jury's out on her kids though. I don't think I have any, which explains why stuff doesn't follow me around the way it does my sister. I've only had experiences at friends' houses & around my mom & sister + my sister's kids. I think this type of ability not only attracts them but serves as a power source they can draw upon to make themselves known).
…aaand now that half of you think I'm nuts, let's move on.
Balancing the ghost convo, she complimented me a few times too, which also helped me not be annoyed. She talked about how she thinks I'm good at knowing how to take care of myself, and she also mentioned how I was always smart, but when I was a child I felt the need to SHOW everyone how smart I was (haha, true), and now she thinks I've learned to listen to other people more. I don't know what prompted the compliment, but I appreciated it.
-I've moved tables in my Spanish class, and I'm enjoying it more now that I have more people to practice with. The girl I was sitting by before kind of got on my nerves. Plus my ego got stroked when we were learning about double object pronouns, and I was getting everything right while the rest of the class was floundering, and my teacher was like (in Spanish), "You're very analytical," and I just laughed. Understatement. It always amuses me though when someone correctly observes something about me; it's like I don't expect anyone to ever pay attention to me, so when they do, it's always a surprise.
-I turned 32 in January, and my sister threw a cute little party for me with her kids. I even had a princess hat, hee. And she spent $24 on my favorite cake (poppyseed with cream cheese frosting):
The cake pretty much took the place of one large present, though she did give me a bunch of candy & a couple bowls. Apparently there was also supposed to be cups, but she forgot that bag at the store. D'oh.
-I got my first ever cell phone from Safe Link in the mail, and now I feel less like an Amish person. It's nothing fancy though, as you can see:
…But it gets the job done.
-I visited a dermatologist at OHSU the other week, and they removed a funky looking mole from my back + injected steroids into the two huge keloid scars I have (because they hurt & itch all the time). Unfortunately I found out afterward that my financial assistance doesn't cover it (which means my health plan won't cover it either, once it's in place), but they wrote the bill off because the doctor had told me it *would* be covered. I just can't have it done again, which sucks.
-Speaking of things that suck, the site where my feeding tube goes in has been constantly hurting lately. I really want to get it removed, but I won't even be seeing my surgeon until the end of the month. Woe.
-My pyschiatrist rose my dose of wellbutrin to 300 mgs, but I haven't had the chance to go pick up the new dose yet. I'm just hoping it helps with what's left of my depression. I'm still really drowsy during the day too, but that's kind of normal for me when I'm depressed/anxious, so I'm not sure if I should lower my dose of Seroquel. I swear, I hate playing the medication balance game so much.
I wanted to talk about TV in this entry too, but I'm getting a headache, so I'll have to put it off again. I'll try to post later this weekend if I can. I'm dying to talk about this hot-mess season of AHS in particular, if only to share some of its campy, brilliant gifs.
Por ejemplo:
Hahaha. Best moment of the finale by far, followed closely by "BALENCIAGAAAA!", the fierceness in my icon, and Queenie mind-control dancing. (we'll save the critiques for the actual post itself)
For my Vid of the Day, I have a two-for-one special. I found these two vids earlier this week, and they instantly made me miss the hell out of XF: