I can hold you with these eyes

Dude, I pulled a muscle hardcore at work, this weekend. My left shoulder is NOT happy. But hey, sore muscles mean they're getting worked, right?

Speaking of my body, I was all happy yesterday because I weighed myself (for the first time in at least several days, actually) and had dropped down to 102. Today, though? 106! What in the fuck? It had better be because I started my period. I did not eat that much yesterday! Sheesh.

I feel like I have a thousand things to write about, but I don't want to go on forever about all of them. This entry is still going to be lengthy though. No getting out of it, with me writing it.

( That being said, let's dive right in. )

(no subject)

Yep, still sore. I could use a backrub so very much, right now. Ow.

Mom got home from the doctor, and guess what the verdict is? Stress. Um, sorry, but this is what I have to say to that: Heh. I mean, yeah, in the beginning it was an allergic reaction, thyroid issues, and also infection. But the sores and the swelling and such? According to her doctor at least, it's just stress. Meanwhile, Mom was all "Should I call an ambulance? I could be dying!" earlier. God. It just kills me, because everytime someone asked if she was blowing things out of proportion, or exaggerating any of it, she'd get so pissed at them. It doesn't mean I think it was right, the way doctors treated her. But it does mean that, again, she got mad at family members for simply asking something that ended up being correct.

It is amazing, though, the things she goes through from stress. At least we know she's okay, though.

I like how I'm all tired and worn out, just from walking to the store. I had to go up there to get hamburger buns. I'm going to try to make myself a cheeseburger. I know, I know, how daring of me!

I was nervous, walking up there and everything. It was rush-hour (although, really, every hour might as well be, these days), and the roads by my house are busy ones. So I had to like remind myself "No, Rachael, not every driver is staring at you." Heh. Freak. Then I go in the store, and feel all self-conscious, like people are thinking "What's the little girl doing here? Has she lost her Mommy?" Not to mention the other obsessive thoughts that race through my head, around others. I swear, sometimes I wish I could just turn my brain OFF. I mean, not my entire brain, just certain parts. The constant battle with the anxiety gets so exhausting.

( You know you're dying to find out which Pooh Bear character I am )