Jigga WHA?
Mar. 31st, 2011 01:27 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
rachg82Sooooo, apparently I have a job. Not only that, but it pretty much fell in my lap. No interview even needed. I KNOW. WTF.
Here's how it went down:
Dude from temp agency (same guy that got me my job at Wells Fargo last October): Hey, 'sup? Still need a job?
Me: Uh, yeah?
Dude: Cool, here you go. Starts April 11th.
Me: ...
Dude: Want it?
Me: *beat* Um. Okay? I mean, yes. Yes.
Dude: Great. I'll send you the info.
AND THAT WAS IT. Seriously. I don't know how these things happen to me.
Bad news is: it's $10/hr. At Xerox I made $13. Even the Wells Fargo job brought in $12. I haven't made $10/hr or less in years. I know I can live off it, but it sucks.
Also: There's backup receptionist work involved. Most likely only during lunch hours & such, but UGH. Hate that kind of thing. Haaaaaate. Face to face interactions & people potentially watching me type/do things/etc--it's like a recipe for social anxiety probs. Especially right now as I've been feeling super keyed up & on edge since going off the Topamax. Twitchy & shakey & heart-racey & BLAH. I'm sure it's anxiety--for one, the medication's job was to "quiet down" certain nerve cells in the brain, so it makes sense that adjusting to stopping it would cause weirdness; two, I'm suddenly more affected by hunger, and that's throwing me for a huge loop; and three, I'm worried my headaches will get worse again & that I made the wrong decision. Put that all together, and yeah. Anxiety. But starting a job ALSO makes me anxious, so it's a cause for concern. I don't want to get there & panic.
Oh, and? There's a half mile walk from the bus stop to the place. That's not a big deal, except it's business casual. I'd have to figure out a type of shoe that would be comfortable for walking + look appropriate with slacks (and I have to shop for these things--shoes, slacks, blouses--and get the pants hemmed, all of it, in the next week). Things like this stress me out.
On the other hand, the good news is: it's a job. It feels better to earn your money than be simply given it by unemployment. I'll have a purpose every day + a reason to hate Mondays again. It's also NOT a call center.
It's only April through August though, at least as a (supposed) guarantee. It's possibly a temp-to-hire position (where he said I'd more likely make something like $12/hr), but who knows. That's what they always say, & it's definitely not always true.
But WHATEVER. I'm overthinking things. As usual. Point is it's a freakin' J.O.B. And it appeared out of nowhere--with zero effort. So, I'm just gonna go with it. I'll do one of my old anxiety worksheets ahead of time, if needed, and cross my fingers that I do well. Whether I continue looking for something else right away, or give myself time--whatever--all of that can wait to be obsessed over until later. One thing at a time.
For now, I just wanted to drop in & let everyone know. Today's apparently the day for "WAIT, WHAT?"-type news. (Which, btw, for those who haven't heard yet? GUESS WHO'S PREGGERS? Ahhh! I feel like I need to flail my hands around spazzily & run into things.)
Lastly, y'all knew I'd have to include my official Life Transition Anthem here, right?
Here's how it went down:
Dude from temp agency (same guy that got me my job at Wells Fargo last October): Hey, 'sup? Still need a job?
Me: Uh, yeah?
Dude: Cool, here you go. Starts April 11th.
Me: ...
Dude: Want it?
Me: *beat* Um. Okay? I mean, yes. Yes.
Dude: Great. I'll send you the info.
AND THAT WAS IT. Seriously. I don't know how these things happen to me.
Bad news is: it's $10/hr. At Xerox I made $13. Even the Wells Fargo job brought in $12. I haven't made $10/hr or less in years. I know I can live off it, but it sucks.
Also: There's backup receptionist work involved. Most likely only during lunch hours & such, but UGH. Hate that kind of thing. Haaaaaate. Face to face interactions & people potentially watching me type/do things/etc--it's like a recipe for social anxiety probs. Especially right now as I've been feeling super keyed up & on edge since going off the Topamax. Twitchy & shakey & heart-racey & BLAH. I'm sure it's anxiety--for one, the medication's job was to "quiet down" certain nerve cells in the brain, so it makes sense that adjusting to stopping it would cause weirdness; two, I'm suddenly more affected by hunger, and that's throwing me for a huge loop; and three, I'm worried my headaches will get worse again & that I made the wrong decision. Put that all together, and yeah. Anxiety. But starting a job ALSO makes me anxious, so it's a cause for concern. I don't want to get there & panic.
Oh, and? There's a half mile walk from the bus stop to the place. That's not a big deal, except it's business casual. I'd have to figure out a type of shoe that would be comfortable for walking + look appropriate with slacks (and I have to shop for these things--shoes, slacks, blouses--and get the pants hemmed, all of it, in the next week). Things like this stress me out.
On the other hand, the good news is: it's a job. It feels better to earn your money than be simply given it by unemployment. I'll have a purpose every day + a reason to hate Mondays again. It's also NOT a call center.
It's only April through August though, at least as a (supposed) guarantee. It's possibly a temp-to-hire position (where he said I'd more likely make something like $12/hr), but who knows. That's what they always say, & it's definitely not always true.
But WHATEVER. I'm overthinking things. As usual. Point is it's a freakin' J.O.B. And it appeared out of nowhere--with zero effort. So, I'm just gonna go with it. I'll do one of my old anxiety worksheets ahead of time, if needed, and cross my fingers that I do well. Whether I continue looking for something else right away, or give myself time--whatever--all of that can wait to be obsessed over until later. One thing at a time.
For now, I just wanted to drop in & let everyone know. Today's apparently the day for "WAIT, WHAT?"-type news. (Which, btw, for those who haven't heard yet? GUESS WHO'S PREGGERS? Ahhh! I feel like I need to flail my hands around spazzily & run into things.)
Lastly, y'all knew I'd have to include my official Life Transition Anthem here, right?
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(no subject)
Date: 2011-04-01 06:35 pm (UTC)