Life hard

[rachg82]

Wow. Um, okay, clearly I was not meant to ever step foot in a kitchen.

Did you guys know that a clove of garlic looks like this and not this?

I bet you did.

Guess who didn't? Thaaat would be me. *waves*

See, this is what happens when, A. simple tasks are your arch nemesis, B. no one ever really taught you how to cook, and C. your name is Rachael.

Now, imagine a recipe that calls for THREE cloves of garlic. Imagine meticulously peeling all three bulbs (whilst patting yourself on the back for managing such an amazing feat, obvs) & trying to mince them all together with basil in a blender, thinking to yourself, "Y'know, that looks like an awful lot of garlic." Imagine checking a YouTube vid to see if you're doing it right & then realizing your mistake. Imagine trying to remove said excess garlic--after it's already mashed up to bits--and STILL ending up with the most superfied garlic-tastic pesto sauce ever made. Like, try a taste & jump back three feet, eyes-watering, garlic-tastic. Also, assume you put 2/3 cup of olive oil in vs. 1/2. Because that's just how you roll. You were too busy spilling shit all over the floor to double-check your numbers.

…Seriously. It's not easy being me.

And now I'm supposed to do laundry? Go to the store? I OBJECT.

Comments

[rachg82.livejournal.com]

It reminds me of this time I attempted to make cookies with my BFF, back when we were like nine or ten years old, and we didn't have any baking powder so we were all, "Whatevs, let's use baking salt." Sooo clueless.