Let me tell you a little story about a man named SHHH!

[rachg82]

I'm having one of my "For the love of God, SHUT IT!" days. Heh.

That's what I feel like thundering out, right now. My Mom? Never stops moving her mouth. Blah blah blippidy blah. Even when no one's listening! She just keeps right on talking. "These metal shavings are all over the carpet! I'm gonna have to vacuum the whole house! Corinne said she'd come over, where the Hell is she? I need to go places, and do laundry! Should I wait until she gets here? Rachael, this bathroom floor needs to be mopped! When are you going Christmas shopping? Later? Why later? Why do you put everything off? Who cares if you're going there for work, later? Just go now! We don't have any pop! Now I have to go to the store! Look at all the leaves in the driveway! Joeeeeeeeeeeeee!" God, just make it stop! Heh. Christ. And when she isn't flapping her gums, she's making noise in some other way. Like taking five hundred years to vacuum the family room. And Joe's watching some movie upstairs, and has the volume up way loud (probably in an attempt to drown out the incessant Mom!chatter). I know little things like that shouldn't get under my skin, but they do. Constant noise drives me crazy. I mean, I have to deal with it so much at work, that when I get home, I just want some silence. But in this house? Ha! That's a funny joke. I should've put earplugs on my Christmas list. Heh. Or stuff to soundproof the downstairs living room, and my bedroom. That would kick ass.

Oh, and like I implied just now, I do need to do Christmas shopping. Like, all of it. I've only bought one gift so far (for willothewisps), and I haven't even sent it yet! Nor have I even sent cards! Le sigh. The mall is really about a stone's throw from pure Hell, right now. Especially when I'm in my "Get away, get away, get away! Shut up, shut up, shut up!" mood. Hee. I'm sure I'll just love being in those crowds! I'm not going to try to do it all today, though. I'm just going to show up like an hour or so before I need to clock in. I'll buy some of my gifts, and then get the rest before work, tomorrow. Impossible, you say? Watch me. I am the professional speedy shopper. I go in with a mission in mind, and take care of business. I know how to walk too, while most of the people you encounter in the mall sadly do not. I want to stop them, and be like "You see, the thing about walking? You MOVE YOUR FEET. Yes, there you go. Doesn't it feel good? And get some general idea of where the Hell you're going, so you're not trudging along like a pack of sloths, in my fucking way, stopping every second in a big herd, to oooh and ahhh at window displays. And if you are going to stop? MOVE TO THE SIDE. There are five thousand people here today, this is not the time for you to take some leisurely trip to the mall, window watching. Some people have places to go. Now MOVE!"

Heh, I totally will squeeze through people too. It's one of those times that being little comes in handy. Same reason why my friends used to send me ahead first, when we'd go to a concert with general admission seating. I'd run ahead and squeeze past everyone, and always get a seat in the front rows, then my friend would catch up and I'd have a seat saved for them. I'll do like limbo moves to get through the crowd, too. Hee. "Okayyy, under this arm, and squeeze between this fat ass and the wall, and off I go!"

I close again tonight, and then tomorrow night. After that, though? I HAVE THE REST OF THE WEEK OFF! Whoo! At least, I'm supposed to. I won't be surprised if I get a call, the day after Christmas, all "Rachael, can you come in?" I should just pretend to not be home. Hee. Okay, no, I won't. If they call, I'll go in. But I hope they don't! I want a break, yo. But yes, I'm all counting the hours. Heh. Two more nights, two more nights, two more nights. . .it's like a mantra. Particularly since when I go back, holidays will be ovah! Hallelujah! Well, there'll still be the whole New Years thing, and returns are pretty massive for a while after Christmas, but whatev. That'll be more painful for the cashiers than us MCAs; we'll just have to deal with those people perhaps shopping/messing things up when they come to return gifts. It'll slowly start getting better, and then January is always like one of the slowest months of the year. Of course that comes with the drawback of less hours, but things will kick up again in February, but without it being anything like Christmas.

I wonder if I'm going to get sentenced to kids' again, tonight. Hee. Like it's torture. Man, talk about loud. Holy fuck. The worst? There's these toys in the main aisle between girls' and boys'; they're those sticks with the horse heads at the end, you know? And the kids pretend to ride them? I can't remember what you call them, for some reason. My brain has died, apparently. But anyway, the ones we have make music. We used to have ones with unicorn heads, but now all we have are the girl and boy horses, and they're constantly singing "I'm a pret-ty pooony! Clippidy clap, clippidy clap" or something. All. Day. Long. Everytime one stops, a kid picks it back up and gets it going again. Or an employee turns it on, out of some sick inability to resist. Heh. The manager last night did it, and looked at me, like "I hate that thing so much, but I can't resist doing it! I want to punch it in the face." Hee!

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[eternaltimtams.livejournal.com]

*Hopes for a work free Christmas period for Rach*